


A not so normal day in the life of a Nazi

by jukii



Category: The Centricide (Webseries)
Genre: For the most part at least, M/M, all of the relationships are platonic, i might be projecting my problems onto Nazi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-27
Updated: 2020-10-27
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:41:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27229771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jukii/pseuds/jukii
Summary: Nazi needs to write a paper for school, but gets distraced constantly. He ends up visiting Ancom and being unproductive. Plus, he kinda has a mental breakdown at the end of the day.
Relationships: Authright/Libright, Nazi/Ancap, Nazi/Ancom, Right unity, authright/libleft, opposite unity - Relationship
Comments: 8
Kudos: 25





	A not so normal day in the life of a Nazi

It was exactly 10.00 am, Thursday. Nazi had just woken up from 3 hours of sleep. It felt more like a nap to him. Lately, the Identitarian started reading more. Or at all. He read until 7 in the morning, when he practically collapsed in his bed, out of tiredness. Luckily, no one had a problem with him sleeping until 10 am. He was on his fall holidays at the moment, so there was no need for waking up early.

Nazi rolled around in bed for a few more minutes, before sitting up and taking a glance in his mirror. He really needed a shower. His straw blond hair looked horrible right now. It was all messed up and greasy. His face didn’t look that much better. The bags under his eyes made him look like he hadn’t slept for an entire week. His face looked even paler than it already was, because of his almost pitch-black under eye bags. 

He finally decided to get out of bed and quickly grabbed a towel, before he went to the bathroom. Nazi quickly emptied his bladder and jumped into the shower. He never understood why people were pissing in the shower. He just thought of it as another act of degeneracy and forgot about it pretty quickly.

The White-Nationalist turned on the shower and set the temperature to 40°C. He always liked hot showers in the morning. He could wash off all the slack from the previous day & night and start freshly into the new day. The water drops on his skin felt awakening. This was exactly what he needed after his short sleep today. After 5 more minutes he finally stepped out of the shower, and put the towel around his waist. 

He looked into the mirror, while wiping away some of the fog that started settling on it. Looks good enough, he thought to himself. Nazi quickly brushed his theeth and went out of the bathroom. It was directly opposite of his own room, to his luck.

He saw his phone laying on his bed. The notification light was blinking. However, no one messaged him. A mail, a Youtube notification and something he had swiped away too quickly to see what it was.

His friends were probably also still sleeping. Well, maybe all except for Tankie. He normally woke up pretty early, even on days off. Nazi also woke up early most days, but recently he was feeling extremly unmotivated to wake up at all. His alarm was always set to 8 am. He would press the snooze button multiple times, before deciding to just turn off his alarm completely and going back to sleep. He would wake up again at around 10 or even 11 am. At this time it was impossible for him to sleep. The sun would be shining in through the two windows he had in his room, making it unable to fall back asleep without suffocating under the blanket, because of the lack of oxygen there.

It started to get a little cold, as he still only wore the towel around his waist. He put on a shirt that laid on the floor and a pair of sweatpants. While doing so, he let his eyes wander through the room. The Authoritarian noticed that his room looked quite messy, so he decided to tidy it up a little at first.

The clothes on his floor, the dirty dishes on his desk and the empty water bottles scattered around his room made him kinda uncomfortable. His room hadn’t been this messy for a long time. He threw all of the dirty clothes into a pile, a rather big pile to be honest. Nazi wondered how long ago it was, that he tidied up a little. He threw his already worn clothes into the laundry basket and collected all of the bottles and cans, so he could deposit them later. He would get like 3€ out of them. It wasn’t much, but you could still buy yourself breakfast or even a cheap lunch with that. 

In the end he also brought his dishes into the kitchen. While going up the stairs to the second floor, he almost let one of his cups fall, however he was able to catch it before it shattered into pieces. In the kitchen he then realized that he needed to unload the dishwasher. His mother told him to. She always wanted him to help in the household. Chores and stuff like that. Normally his bigger sister would do that, but she was currently at work. Like his mother and father. He was alone at home. Until 2 pm, he was practically a free man. Well, not really a man. He was still just 16 after all.

The Nationalist started unloading the dishwasher, whilst whistling ‘Erika’. It was one of his favourite songs. Too bad he left his phone in his room, otherwise he would have just put on the song like that. After 10 or so minutes, the dishwasher was empty and Nazi was finished for the day. Kinda. There was still one thing that bothered him. The research paper.

This year, in grade 10, they were supposed to write a research paper, on a topic of their choice. The minimum amount of pages was ten. They got this task back in the beginning of the school year. The deadline is December 18. Today’s date: October 22. He had less than two months to finish the whole thing. Problem: He didn’t even have a single sentence at the moment. Everyday he woke up telling himself, “I’ll start tomorrow, it’s not that big of a deal…”. However, he never began. Most of his classmates and also friends had already started. One day he overheard a guy from his class saying that he had already written down about six pages. Nazi felt bad. He felt useless. He couldn’t get anything done. He wanted to finish it, while he still had holidays and free time, but he just wasn’t motivated enough. 

This school year had just started, but it was already more exhausting than any other year ever has been. He held multiple presentations in around two months, ranging from 10 to 25 minutes of talking time. He already wrote what felt like hundreds of tests, and it just keeps going and going. 

His sleep schedule was pretty fucked up for a while. He would go to sleep at around one or two am, after trying to take a power nap at midnight. After coming home from school, he would nap for 2 to 3 hours. This process repeated for around two weeks until he had finally slept like a normal human being again.

After wandering off, Nazi tried to focus again and decided that he should probably start researching some stuff and writing at least a few sentences. He went back into his room and turned his Laptop on. The background image was nice. It was a selfie with Tankie and him, they had made not too long ago. He just stared at it for a while, before deciding to open Chrome and.... what was it that he was trying to do?

Nazi looked at the search bar, confused about what he wanted to type out. His glance fell onto his bookmarks. YouTube, Twitch, 4chan, Twitter, 8kun, reddit and some other websites. He thought that watching one or two videos wouldn’t take that much time, so he opened up YouTube. There weren’t any interesting new uploads, so he just scrolled a bit through the front page until he found something interesting. 

He watched video after video, almost like he was in some trance. He had completely forgotten his plans about the research paper.

*ding*

The Discord notification threw him back into reality. It was already 1.30 pm. Fuck. Anyway, it was Homofash who wrote him.

“Ur already online? Nice”

**“Yea want sth?”**

“nah not really. watcha doing?”

**“nothing really. watched some youtube thats it. what are you up to?”**

Nazi finally remembered why he turned on his Laptop in the first place. He wanted to write the goddamn paper. He felt bad for not doing anything productive the whole day, so he just wrote another message saying **“you aren’t productive as well, right?”**.

“no, not at all. i’m trying draw on my new tablet rn.” Great. He’s also doing nothing.

**“and? does it look good?”**

“kinda but i’m not the best at drawing anyway.”

Nazi hated it when Homofash would say such dumb crap. Homofashs drawings always looked amazing, but he always hated them for some reason. He was probably just fishing for compliments.

**“stfu, your drawings always look great.”**

“if you think so”

**“idiot, everyone says so.”**

“fine fine….”

They chatted for a couple more minutes, before Homofash decided to go offline again. He apparently went somewhere with his family. Nazi didn’t bother asking. Not too long after he became a notification on his phone. A message. This time it was Ancom. 

“Hey fash, wanna come over maybe? Play some games, play some guitar maybe.”

**“Sure, why not. You have a time?”**

“In like an hour or so?”

**“Sounds good.”**

Ancom and him grew even closer, after their ‘Centricide’ school project from a while ago. They already knew each other for quite a while, and even became friends a fews years ago, but somehow they started to bond even more. They had no idea how it was possible, but they somehow didn’t hate each other. Nazi got up from his couch and checked his money supply. He would need to go by bus, so he needed a little money for the ticket. He could theoretically walk there, but he didn’t want to waste a minimum of 30 minutes. 

He checked the ticket prices. 4,40€ for a day-ticket. He still had 15€ left, so spending a little money shouldn’t be that problematic. The Identitarian didn’t want to look like a hobo to Ancom, so he dressed up in some more casual clothes. Some jeans and a new, fresh t-shirt. He even decided to put on his hat. He wore it a little less often nowadays. He didn’t like it if everyone already knew which ideology he was, just judging by his looks. However he thought it should be fine today, since it was just Ancom he was going to see.

After eating some lunch and telling his mom that he’ll visit Ancom, Nazi rushed out of the house. He kinda ignored the time, so in the end he had to run to the bus stop to still catch the bus. 5 or so minutes later he was already in Ancoms city. Or more like village. It fit with all of his commune shittalk. However, he still needed to walk like 10 more minutes to Ancoms house. Nazi came here with the bus that only had one stop in the entire town. Unfortunately, the bus stop was on the complete opposite side of where Ancoms house was.

Whilst sitting inside the bus and walking through the village, Nazi was listening to some music. He may have been in a hurry, but he would never forget his beloved earphones. He was listening to some music that Tankie recommended to him recently. Of course it was russian. Nazi still liked it, however. In a weird sorta way. He could barely understand anything and russian always sounded to him like a weird, disgusting language, but there was one song that he kinda enjoyed. No, he really enjoyed it. 

“Пофиг” by Инь-Ян {btw Пофиг - Whatever}

It was a little older, Tankie probably found out about it through his parents. Nazi listened to it the whole day. No, he was already listening to this song for multiple days in a row. He probably heard it like 100 times already, but he still listened to it on loop for hours on end. After walking through the entire town, Nazi finally reached Ancoms house. He always found it weird that Ancom somehow had the biggest house out of all of the extremists. Even bigger than Ancaps. Well, his family had multiple houses…so it’s probably unfair to compare.

Anyway, Nazi rang the doorbell and waited for what felt like ages, until Ancom had finally opened the door for him.Qis parents and siblings were on vacation without qim, so qi was the only one at home until Sunday. Qi already bragged about this hundreds of times, even months before their holidays.

“Hey Nazi!” Ancom was happy as usual. Well, ‘usual’ if you consider qim being on some combination of drugs as usual. “Hi”. Nazi wanted to come in, but Ancom had stopped him in the doorway. “Wait a minute, don’t take off your shoes just now. I want to show you something!” Ancom grabbed Nazis wrist and practically dragged him to the garage. Nazi, still unsure of what was going on, waited for Ancom to finally stop fiddeling with the door of the garage, and just open it.

“You need some help maybe?” Nazi leaned down to Ancom, who was still struggeling with the lock.

“No, I don’t need any help from you!” Ancom squirmed. Suddenly qi actually managed to unlock the door. “See, I can also do things on my own!” Nazi just rolled his eyes, while Ancom opened the garage door. 

“I finally have my own motorcycle!” Ancom said in a voice that was even higher pitched than usually. Nazi finally remembered that Ancom told him something about his licence and such. He didn’t really care about it too much, but he was still happy for Ancom. Qi was very exited about this, and Nazi didn’t want to ruin this moment for him.

“Looks nice.” was the only thing that Nazi could add to this. He didn’t really know anything about motorcycles. He couldn’t tell you if it was better than this other one or how it worked. However, he could look at it and judge the aesthetics of it.

“It doesn’t only look nice, it is nice. You know-...” Ancom started monologuing about different specs and Nazi tried to listen, but he just didn’t care. He came here to spend some time with Ancom, and not to hear something about motorcycles.

Nazi put up with qis almost 5 minute monologue, after which they finally went inside. They went up the stairs and into Ancoms room. To Nazi’s surprise qi had cleaned up his room beforehand. “Looks clean for once.” Nazi said while chuckling a little. “I only cleaned up because you came over.”

Ancom turned on his PC. While it was booting up, qi took one of quis guitars and started playing some songs. Qi was a good guitar player. Ancom has been playing since second grade. Recently he even started playing bass. Nazi always liked it when Ancom played quitar. It made him feel warm inside. Sometimes he even sang with qim. Ancom would play something and Nazi would sing. He was a pretty good singer actually. Ancom never really liked singing. His shrill voice made it practically impossible to sing most songs.

“I started practicing some new things.” Ancom said enthusiastically. “It’s that one song I showed you last time.” qi added. Qi started playing and Nazi remembered what it was. 

“G. O. A. T.” by Polyphia

He had listened to the first few seconds of it a few days ago. Ancom was playing the guitar solo, and it was great. He didn’t quite get what qi was doing. It just seemed like Ancom was flinging his hands around.

“I mean, it’s still not that good. I need to practice a little more” Nazi was confused as Ancom said that. There were some small mistakes, sure, but it still sounded amazing to him. He would have never been able to learn this. Especially not in two days time. 

“Your kidding, right? This was great.” 

“If you think so.”

Ancom laid the guitar back on qis bed and turned to his PC. “Wanna play some Brawlhalla?” qi asked, while already starting up the programm. It was an useless question. Nazi would always play Brawlhalla with qim.

“You can sit down on the cajón, I don’t want to bring another chair.” Ancom said whilst pointing to the box in the corner of the room. Is there an instrument that qi didn’t have?

They played for a couple of hours, before taking a break to go outside for a couple of minutes. Ancom needed to calm down again, but qis parents didn’t allow qim to smoke inside. Nazi never liked that Ancom was smoking weed. Especially to this extent. “You want some?” Asked Ancom pointing his joint into Nazi’s direction. “You know that I don’t smoke that shit.” Nazi hissed back at qim. Qi just rolled his eyes at him. Nazi would have maybe thought about it, if it would have been tabaco and not weed. He never told Ancom, but he would sometimes smoke cigarettes. But he thought that Ancom already knew. Someone surely told him. Probably Tankie. He was always concerned about their drug usage. 

It was already getting dark outside. Nazi guessed it was around 6 pm. He had his phone with him, but he didn’t want to look right now. It was a nice moment. Ancom and him were sitting on the stairs leading up to the front door. Qi was leaning against Nazi. ‘Maybe this day wasn’t so bad after all’ Nazi thought looking up into the sky. He was suddenly thrown back into reality, when Ancom stood up and threw away qis joint stub. “Come on, let’s get back playing!” Ancom was already going up the stairs to the front door.

Back in Ancoms room they sat down, chose their characters and started up a new round. The clattering of the keyboard and controller made Nazi unfocused. His hands were getting sweaty, but it was cold sweat. What was going on with him? He got distracted from the rainbow lights on Ancom’s mouse and keyboard. Nazi wanted to focus on the game again. His mind was empty but his thoughts were somehow still distracting him. 

First kill.

The kill made him think. Nazi was winning most of the games today. Normally Ancom would win at least half of the time, but qi had won just two out of probably 30 games today. And this time he couldn’t even blame qis Wifi-connection. 

Second kill.

Nazi didn’t even get how he was winning. He was playing with Vector, a character he usually never played and didn’t even like. Ancom played with him sometimes, and his attacks were extremely annoying every single time. Ancom played Cross, his main character. Qi usually always won with him. Qi knew most of his combos and how to use them. However, for some reason he was just bad at playing today.

Qi finally managed to kill Nazi once, but there was still no way qi could win this game.

Nazi should be happy that he was better then Ancom. His superiority complex should leave him extremely satisfied. But he wasn’t. He hated it in fact. The only thing he was good at, is playing some stupid video game. He wanted more. Nazi was never really good at anything. 

Homofash was a better draftsman than him.

Tankie had better grades than him.

Ancom was better at playing instruments.

Ancap was the only one who was on the same level as Nazi. Sure, he was rich, but that wasn’t a skill. Like playing video games. It wasn’t a skill, that was helpful for Nazi. It wasn’t something he could be proud of. He didn’t want to be proud of something like that. Still…

Third kill. He had won again. 

Ancom was getting more annoyed every game. Nazi thought that he should maybe let qim win, so qi wasn’t pissed anymore. He decided to otherwise. It was quite fun being better then qim. “Don’t you need to get back home soon?” Ancom asked him. You could hear a slight annoyance in qis voice. “I guess I’ll take the next bus.” He answered quickly starting the next round. 

Nazi decided to choose random and he got Kaya. He didn’t like her but he couldn’t change it now anyway. He was sure he would still win. Today was his day. He was winning probably 95% of todays rounds. He felt dumb for feeling proud of something useless like this. However, Nazi couldn’t deny that chrushing Ancom every round was amusing. The rainbow lights started distracting him again, but he tried to focus on the game. Although you couldn’t really call it focusing. 

Ancom had killed him.

Nazi was a little confused. He assumed that he had just been too careless. He again thought of letting Ancom win this round, just so qi would have a little more fun. After spawning again he had instantly killed Ancom. Both had 2 lives left. Both still on 0%. Nazi was sure now. He isn’t going to let Ancom win. He had a brilliant win streak. He didn’t want to destroy it, just so Ancom wouldn’t be pissed anymore. 

Nazi lost his second life.

“Holy fuck, that combo was just unfair, I could have never dodged that!” Nazi thought to himself. He was still sure he would win. He knew he would win. He was determined. After some missed and dodged heavy attacks, he had also managed to kill qim a second time. They both had 1 life left. Problem: Nazi was already pretty damaged. He would need to be cautious. He couldn’t let Ancom win. He didn’t want to lose the last round. All the other rounds were perfect. There was no way he could lose now.

Third kill. However, now it was Ancom who won.

Nazi couldn’t believe it. He lost. He had lost after so many good games. “FINALLY!” qi cried out. The Identitarian glanced over to qim, “Took you long enough”. “Well, I guess I’ll get going then.” he added. “Sounds good”, Ancom stood up and walked over to the bed. “Don’t forget you earphones” qi said, while throwing them over to Nazi. “Thanks.”

They went downstairs and Nazi put his shoes and jacket back on. “Are you free next week?” Ancom asked. “I think so” Nazi answered quite unsure. “It’s not like I have something to do anyway.” he added. “Well, anyway. See ya!” Ancom gave Nazi a quick hug. “Yea, bye.” Ancom closed the door again.

'It’s not like I have anything to do.' Nazi thought back. Of course he had stuff to do. He remembered. The goddamn research paper. He wanted to punch himself so bad. Nazi wanted to start writing today, but he did nothing. The whole day was filled with unproductivity and he hated it. He tried to forget about it for now and went to the bus stop. While walking through Ancoms village he listened to some music again. It was again “Пофиг”. It was perfect for his mood right now. 

Nazi didn’t care. He just didn’t fucking care about anything. This day felt horrible. Sure, he had some fun with Ancom today, but he didn’t get anything done today. Like all the days before. He wondered why he even decided to go to Ancom in the first place. Nazi knew that he needed to start writing soon, but he didn’t care and now he felt dumb because of it.10 minutes later Nazi arrived at the bus stop, however he decided that he would walk home.

_Просто мне все пофиг!_

He ran across the road and onto the bike path. There was no sidewalk, so he walked along the bike path. He was completely alone. He decided to take a look at his phone. 6.26 pm. His bus would be arriving in a few minutes, but it was already too late for that. While walking down the deserted path Nazi started singing. No one could hear him anyway. And frankly, he didn’t care. He was still listening to the same song. He had probably heard it 50 times already, only counting today. There was just something about it that spoke to him. 

Nazis russian was pretty bad, but it was enough to scream “Просто мне все пофиг!” out of the top of his lungs. It was practically the only line that he could sing anyway. He didn’t even understand most of the other lines. He could look them up, but he wasn’t able to read russian anyway, so he just let it be.

_Просто мне все пофиг!_

Everyone who drove past Nazi probably thought that he was crazy. He even saw his bus driving past him. There was no way back now. He could walk home in around 30 minutes. The next bus wouldn’t be arriving any earlier, so Nazi was determined to not waste any time waiting and doing nothing. He wanted to waste those 30 minutes walking back home. After walking along the bike path for around 5 minutes, Nazi saw the big grocery store on the outskirts of the city. He had already finished half of his route. Since he didn’t have any lunch, Nazi decided that he should buy himself a little something. 

The trip to the store was quick. He bought some chips, a coke and an energy drink. Outside of the store he wanted to open the coke. Problem: It was a glass bottle with a bottle cap. Well, not really a problem. Nazi didn’t need a bottle opener. He had teeth. A now hurt tooth later he had opened the bottle without any problems. He took a big sip and decided to continue his home back home. 

Nazi had already listened to "Пофиг" dozens of times today. He felt like his brain started malfunctioning because he heard the same song over and over and over again. He couldn't hear it anymore. The Identitarian started scrolling through his music playlist. 

89 songs and not a single he wanted to hear at the moment. 

He decided to not listen to any music at the moment, but he kept his earphones in. They made him feel better somehow. However, he couldn’t even bear the sound of nothing at the moment. He needed another song. Still walking along the path he had almost ran into somebody, because he looked at his phone the whole time. There was just one other song that he wanted to listen to now. It was also russian. For some reason he wanted to listen to russian music today.

“Пост-пост” by монеточка

Anti-Centrist recently started listening to it and Nazi took a liking in it as well. He didn’t really know what it was about, but it sounded nice. It was really calming at the moment. He needed that right now. 

The calming music made the White Nationalist think. When was the last time he had so much fun with Ancom? On Tuesday probably, he thought. However, it wasn’t that great actually. Not because of Ancom at least. Nazi had seen Ancap again, after quite a while. Well, it was just under a week actually, but he never saw him much anyway. He and most of his friends were in class b, whilst Ancap was in class a. Thinking back, Nazi already knew him since elementary school. Just like Ancom. Back then he was neither friends with Ancom nor Ancap. Ancom and him started hanging out together in grade 8. Ancap joined shortly after, just because he was and still is Ancom’s best friend.

_Я такая пост-пост, я такая мета-мета_

Anyway, Tuesday was... interesting. Nazi sneaked out of the house at 11 pm, so he could meet up with Ancap, Ancom and... Queer-Anarchism. He never liked the guy. He was just there, because Ancom always brought him. Nazi never really talked with him. He didn’t even want to. While Ancom and QueerAn were talking about some unimportant crap, Ancap and he would laugh about shitposts on reddit or 4chan. Or they would just throw jokes around. Nazi always enjoyed being with Ancap. 

It wasn’t in a degenerate kind of way though. He never even once thought about Ancap in a different way then a friend. At least he had told himself that. However, on the inside he knew that he liked Ancap. No, he really liked Ancap.

Nazi always hated it when someone would spend time with Ancap, when he couldn’t. He always wanted to be in the same class as him, although he didn’t even know him that much. He just liked being near him. He enjoyed his presence. He loved it. He needed it.

_Я такая пост-пост, я такая мета-мета_

Ancom doesn’t know about Nazi’s crush on Ancap, and he would never in a million years tell qim about it. He would rather put a bullet through his brain then talk about his feelings to anyone, who isn’t his reflection in the mirror. However, he especially had a problem with telling Ancom. Nazi was sure that Ancom didn’t know, however qi still mocked him. Qi would always make weird comments.

Nazi and Ancap being secretly in love, and hiding it from everybody. 

Jokes about online dates, when Ancap and Nazi were alone on qis Discord server.

Leaving both of them alone in the same room ‘to see what happens’.

Nazi always hated those ‘jokes’. He hated that Ancom was right. Everytime Ancom made one of those remarks he felt caught. He was sure that if he would make even a single weird reaction to that, Ancom would get even more suspicious. Nazi was sure that they were just jokes, but he always had a bad feeling afterwards. Especially if Ancap was with him. When Ancom would joke about such things in Ancaps and Nazis presence they would uncontrollably hiss back at him, for even thinking about such a possibility. Such degeneracy…

While thinking that, he passed by two smoking women. The scratchy, itchy smell of the smoke, made him want to smoke a cigarette himself. ‘This city is full of degeneracy’ he thought. Sure, smoking in itself was already degenerate enough, but women doing it made it even worse. Even more degenerate. Like him.

Nazi had already come to terms with his own degeneracy when he first realized that he… _had a thing for the capitalist_. If someone would ever find out about it, he would most likely kill them. And probably kill himself afterwards, for admitting to his degeneracy.

He just hoped that Ancap felt the same way about him. The way he looked at Nazi sometimes. How they would talk to each other, when they were alone. The awkward moments of silence, when their hands met for 0.2 seconds and the dozens of apologies that came afterwards. When Ancap would laugh about Nazis horrible jokes. The one time where they played truth or dare, and all of them had to answer if they had a crush on someone or not. They had an awkward exchange of views, before saying that they both were unsure. Nazi shook his head, ‘There is no way in hell, that he meant me.” he thought to himself.

No one would ever think of him in that sort of way. He was sure. No one ever had a crush on him. He had heard about different peoples crushes, and not even one of them liked Nazi. Most of the time their answers were Tankie or Ancom… even Homofash was mentioned. Nazi didn’t need a girlfriend… _or boyfriend_ , but he would still like to know it people liked him. Loved him. Cared for him. Or he was just unlovable. If he would never get… _a partner_ in his life.

At this point, Nazi had already finished his coke. The point with him buying a glass bottle was that he could shatter it after he finished. He could release all of his tensions. Problem: He was already in the center of town, so there were people who would see them. A lot of people actually. For some reason it was quite crowded today. He probably walked past 5 different groups of people. Normally, the townsquare was completely empty. Especially at this time. 

He could hear the church bell.

Nazi took a look at his phone. 7 pm already. He had told his mother he would come back no later than 7 pm. Well, jokes on him. However, his home was already pretty close. He would need around five more minutes at max. After walking through the town center he had arrived at the bridge. He could already see his house on the other side of the river that divided the town.

While walking across the bridge Nazi slowed down more and more, until he paused for a little and leant against the railing. He still had the coke bottle in his hands. He thought of throwing it into the river. He just wanted to get rid of it. However, there were still a few cars driving past him and he didn’t want anyone to see him littering. He decided against it. Nazi, all of the sudden, wanted to keep the bottle. It would remind him of this day. This great but simultaneously horrible day. 

‘What would happen, if I jumped off?’ Nazi suddenly wondered. Pretty typical actually. Call of the void. This thought would cross his mind every time, as soon as he looked down into the river. He would never do it. He wasn’t suicidal or anything. Just curious. He would like to know what it would feel like if you drowned. Sure, it wouldn’t be a pleasant experience, but an interesting one nonetheless. Nazi quickly shrugged of his thought again and went home, already searching his keys on the way there. 

Nazi had finally arrived, after half an hour of walking. He quickly took off his boots and jacket and ran up into the kitchen to inform his parents about his arrival.

 _“Oh Nazi, du bist auch endlich da! Wie war’s bei Ancom?”_ his mother said, apparently worried about her sons late arrival.

_“War ganz gut, wir haben eigentlich nur gezockt.”_

_“Ja was denn sonst, naja egal… wir essen in 10 Minuten. Komm dann bitte wieder hoch.”_

_“Ja ja, mach ich.”_ Nazi shouted back, while already going down the stairs.

Nazi came into his room and let himself fall down onto his bed. Still holding the glass bottle in his hand. He took a look at it. ‘This will be a nice keepsake’ he thought. He was happy that he didn’t shatter it. With his luck, he would have probably even hurt himself while doing so. He put the glass bottle on his night stand and stared back at the ceiling. He was tired. He could barely keep his eyes open. It wasn’t even late and he didn’t really do anything tiring today, but he just felt completely wasted.

Nazi didn’t want to eat dinner anyway, so he just decided to go to sleep. It shouldn’t be that big of a deal, if he wouldn’t eat something now. He would wake up in the middle of the night to eat something anyway. He turned over on his side and fell asleep almost at an instant. Or at least he thought that he would. He got distracted by a notification on his phone. A message. It was just Homofash…

“Wanna play some Among Us with the boiiis?”

“Nah not really, sry”

Homofash had read the message and went offline again. Was he disappointed now? Nazi didn’t care. Still looking at his phone he saw something light up. Something green. Someone was typing.

It was Ancap!

Nazi was suddenly awake again. He could hear his heartbeat, like he had just run a goddamn marathon. Why was he so nervous all of the sudden? It was just going to be a message. However, Ancap never really messaged him in the first place. Those 5 seconds felt like literal decades for Nazi. He thought he was going to have a heart attack right then and there.

Ancap stopped typing. 

Still no message. 

He was offline.

Nazi just started at his screen in confusion. He didn’t just imagine all of that, right? There was no way. Ancap just didn’t send it surely. He didn’t want to. He just deleted his message and didn’t even bother with it.

No, no, no. Maybe Nazis internet suddenly crashed. Maybe Ancaps WiFi was bad and it wasn’t sent properly. Maybe the message… maybe… no, he just didn’t send it. That’s all.

Full of disappointment and sorrow Nazi turned off his phone again, and put it on his nightstand. Sleeping was now impossible. He couldn’t stop thinking about it. He wanted to know what Ancap was writing out. Why would he message Nazi all of the sudden? It was uncommon for him. Ancap never chatted with anyone, really. So why Nazi? Especially at this time.

Nazi tried to ignore all of this and decided to take a look who was playing Among Us now. He got onto Discord and looked onto Ancoms server. 

Ancom qimself.

Homofash.

Queer-Anarchism.

Tankie.

Even Conservative.

They were probably still waiting for a few people to join in. Nazi still didn’t want to play. He didn’t want to talk to anybody at the moment. Except for Ancap, but he wasn’t on the call anyway. Nazi put his phone away again and tried to just fall asleep. He rolled around in bed for probably 30 minutes. Still thinking about the incident. He then managed to fall asleep somehow. What he didn’t manage to see however, was that his phone lit up again.

A Notification.

A message.

Ancap.

**Author's Note:**

> Here are all the songs I've mentioned. I would recommend listening to them... they're pretty dope.
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Njywne4GbPU (Пофиг)  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9_gkpYORQLU (G. O. A. T.)  
> (You should already know Пост-пост at this point)
> 
> [I still haven't started writing that damn research paper. I hate my goddamn life]


End file.
